4 Questions to Discover Your Origin Story – Insights from a Marriage and Family Therapist
We all come from somewhere—and understanding where we’ve been is a powerful way to understand who we are now. As a marriage and family therapist, I often encourage clients to reflect on their origin stories. Our earliest influences—whether through family, culture, religion, or language—shape our beliefs, behaviors, and emotional patterns.
Self-inquiry isn't just about nostalgia; it’s about self-awareness. These four journaling questions can help you trace your personal development and uncover hidden drivers behind your relationships, habits, and emotional responses.
1. What Are My Earliest Memories?
Can you distinguish between memories and stories you’ve been told?
Who was there? What did it smell like? How did it feel?
Pay attention to emotional textures—fear, joy, curiosity.
2. Who Were My Earliest Teachers and Mentors?
Think beyond school: neighbors, siblings, grandparents, media figures.
Were these people safe and supportive, or chaotic and unreliable?
Positive or negative, these early figures leave a mark.
3. What Lessons Did They Teach Me?
Consider both spoken and unspoken messages.
Which lessons do you still carry today—about love, success, identity?
Are these lessons helping or hindering your growth?
4. What Am I Proud or Ashamed of From Childhood or Adolescence?
Think of achievements, moments of courage, and mistakes.
These memories often contribute to core beliefs about your worth, power, or potential.
Reflection brings compassion—and sometimes the chance to rewrite old narratives.
As a marriage and family therapist, I guide individuals, couples, and families through these types of reflective questions to help uncover patterns that influence present-day dynamics. Your past doesn’t have to define your future—but understanding it can give you the power to heal and grow.
So take a moment. Journal. Reflect. You might be surprised by what you uncover—and how it can positively impact your relationships today.